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the best lessons cost your pride
Growing up, I was terrible at handling mistakes. I always thought the world was out to get me. Whether it was losing basketball games, failing tests in school or getting crushed in video games, I was pointing fingers everywhere but at myself.
No More Hiding
The habit stopped being debilitating early on but I got really whipped into shape in eleventh grade. My basketball coach that year had been a mentor of mine since I was eleven years old but this was the first year she was my actual coach. There was no more hiding from my mistakes. She was the person I respected most and she would tell me every time I made a mistake.
I believe that was the biggest difference-maker for me. I went from barely playing in any games the year prior to league MVP. My skills didn’t change very much, my ability to learn from my mistakes changed.
“If you got some results you didn’t want, the world is telling you at least one of two things:
You were unlucky
Your ideas about how things work were wrong“ (Parrish, 114)
If you’re unlucky, the same mistake happens at most twice. I wasn’t unlucky. I spent years denying that my ideas about things were wrong. Because admitting my ideas were wrong would have hurt my self-image. I’m not as smart as I thought I was.
What IS a Mistake?
Most people consistently mistake wrong ideas for bad luck. This comes from a fundamental misunderstanding and mistreatment of mistakes. Think about how much people pay for a college education. Many of the same people are not willing to trade their ego for a lesson. That’s what a mistake is–you learn a lesson and you pay with your ego.
Handling and learning from mistakes is not easy. It takes a lot of work and humility to consistently do it the right way. But it’s one of the greatest skills you can learn for two reasons:
“The first mistake is expensive. The second costs a fortune” - Shane (Parrish, 115)
“Admitting error and correcting course is a time-saver” -Shane (Parrish, 116)
Once you make a mistake, you need a combination of strength and safeguards to consistently correct and learn from it. You need the self-accountability to admit you were wrong. You need the self-control to not bury your mistake and face it head on. You need a rule to thank people who point out your mistakes. You need self-confidence to keep your head held high after taking a blow to your ego.
It’s not easy to properly handle mistakes. That’s why lots of people make the same mistakes their whole lives. But you’re not one of those people, you’re a BigNerd.
Brains Gains
When was the last time you admitted to a mistake?
Go have a great day. Face new opportunities head on without fear of falling.
Your Friend,
Noah “BigNerd” Sochaczevski
PS. Tomorrow, we’re getting more practical with 4 steps to handle mistakes properly every time.
