You're Embarrassing Yourself

Control your anger

I find nothing more embarrassing than when anger takes control of me. When I realize my voice is raised, my brow’s furrowed and I’m pointing my finger out straight, I suddenly feel weak. I feel like a little kid again, out of control throwing a tantrum.

I remember the last time I lost my cool like that. I was in the locker room in high school with two of our star players. We just got back from losing by 40 to a team we were supposed to beat and lost our chance at making the playoffs. I was a bench warmer and I wanted to play so badly. So while I sat in my locker listening to them laughing and acting so care-free, I lashed out.

It’s mostly a blur, but I remember raising my voice, calling them names and getting red in the face with anger.

I walked away, realizing what I’d just done and wanting to cry.

I had spent months trying to get closer to my teammates and get a real role on the team. But now I’d broken the law. They would never be in my corner now. I couldn’t rely on them for help. And it was all my fault.

“Anger is apt to forget the existence of law”

(The Moral Sayings of Publius Syrus, 419)

I forgot everything I actually cared about when I let the anger come over me. I forgot what I’d been working so hard to do.

It seems like a theme, that when I get angry, I hurts myself as much, if not more than I hurt the people I’m angry with.

I’ve learned how important it is to keep cool when I start to get angry. Now I’ve gotten much better at controlling it. I use verbal reminders:

• “Noah, what’s actually important.”

• “Noah, is anger the best way to get what you want right now.”

• “Noah, focus on your breath.”

Most of all, I do anything I can to stop the anger from taking over. Because the easiest way to make huge mistakes is to lose control of yourself.

Question of The Day

How do you calm yourself down when you catch yourself losing your cool?

Your Friend,

Noah BigNerd Sochaczevski